Back in the mid-to-late ‘90s, there was this bloke called Wiggie. That wasn’t his actual name, it was the nickname me and my mates gave him because he’d saunter into our local, always wearing the same loose-fitting denim shirt, baggy cream Chinos and Timberland boots, sporting this long, flowing mane of reddish hair. He just looked a bit comical, even back then. In his defence, Wiggie had a nice motor – a very clean, red Peugeot 205 1.9 GTI, but he made even this something prattish.
He’d fitted it with a remote start feature. So a minute or so before he left the pub, he’d fire up the 205 from within. “Hey up, Wiggie’s on the move,” and out he’d pop, clothes flapping like sails in the wind and hair blowing off his shoulders like some awful remake of the Timotei advert. It was just hilarious if we were sat in the beer garden, watching this man thinking he was the definition of cool, while those around thought he was anything but.
I mention this because Ford’s just announced that the 2024 Mustang will not only have a remote start feature, but a remote rev feature, too. Apparently, you start the car using the remote control or the FordPass app, then activate the rev feature by pressing the lock and unlock button together for three seconds. This will raise the revs to 2,000rpm - but there’s more. Press the same buttons again and the engine will rev three times in succession, the revs each time getting higher and higher until they peak at 5,000rpm. 5,000rpm is an awful lot. If you want, you can leave it there or if you’re not satisfied everyone around has heard, repeat the procedure.
My advice, though, is don’t do this. Just like Wiggie, you’ll gain yourself a less-than-glowing reputation. And someone may well write an article about you thirty years later.
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